There's something, I'm not sure what it is, that is making me want to just curl up in a ball and cry. Cry like I haven't in a long time.

I want you back in my life,
but I don't know how to get you there..

For some reason I'm hanging on your every word,
waiting for you to text me and not liking it when you don't,
trying to keep the conversation going,
and wanting to get back that friendship we had when we were 5..

Thanks for remembering me.
Even if the girl you remember isn't quite there anymore.

Hello Past,
I had a feeling you would catch up with me eventually..

All I want to say is ..

Sorry I wasn't a better granddaughter..

You know what?
When I said that, I had actually forgotten you had been there that day. And I'm not "Very Into It And I Admire It." I'm not a pagan. I have no religon. I don't believe there is a god or a goddess or anything, just life and death. Occasionly I like to get tarot readings or rune readings, but that is about it.
And I wasn't treating you like you were stupid, I actually genuinely thought that you had no idea what I was talking about because most people just look at me like I'm a tard when I do or say things like that.
But as for not liking my "new attitude", there is no new attitude. I haven't changed. That was all put on because I did think your new attitude would work with my old one. I have never acted that way before. But being with you and hearing about all your new friends and all the stuff you do made me seem boring. I felt like I had to do someting so that you would be interested.
But apparently not.
Maybe next time we just shouldn't hang out, because this seems to happen every time.